


There are hundreds of people at U.A. These are their Problems

by Tyfasi



Category: Letterkenny (TV), 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Bakugou Katsuki Swears A Lot, Dick Jokes, Humor, Shorts, Slice of Life, Teachers Being Friends, Teenage Dorks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-13
Updated: 2019-11-13
Packaged: 2021-01-30 03:42:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21421612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tyfasi/pseuds/Tyfasi
Summary: A collection of skits from Letterkenny that I felt fit bnha characters a little too well.Characters and tags to be added as needed
Comments: 3
Kudos: 12





	1. A Good Friend

It was the doldrums of the week. Wednesday afternoon and sheer boredom had a bunch of students lounging on the couches. It was the sort of day to rehash old arguments.

Bakugo and Midoriya were sitting next to each other on the couch arguing,  _ again _ , over who would win in a fight. They got into this particular argument on a regular basis every time they each decided they had improved enough to bring up new material as supporting evidence.

Of course, after the last fight, neither wanted to actually risk hashing it out for real and getting caught. Again.

They were getting into it when Iida and Uraraka came in and sat on the couch next to them.

“Would not,” Bakugo was saying as they sat down.

“Would too,” Midoriya countered.

“Uraraka, who would win in a fight, me or Kacchan?” Midoriya asked.

“Bakugou,” she said immediately. Midoriya made a betrayed sound as Bakugo barked a laugh.

“I’d have to agree, Midoriya,” Iida said.

“ _ What?” _ Midoriya said and Bakugo cackled.

“Sorry, I’m just saying,” Uraraka said.

“And  _ I’m _ just saying under the right circumstances -” Midoriya started

“No, absolutely not,” Uraraka finished.

“Definitely not,” Iida added. 

Bakugo leaned back and propped his feet up on the coffee table with his terrifying grin plastered across his face.

“You guys argue about this all the time, why don’t you just arm-wrestle and solve this?” Uraraka said.

“No,” Iida huffed.

“What, why?” she asked.

“Well, it’s not a good metric for strength and especially not a good metric for fighting capabilities. You’re either born a good arm wrestler or you’re not,” Iida explained.

“Then what should they do about this?” Uraraka asked.

“They’re just going to have to fight,” Iida said.

“Fuck yeah, I’ll fight you Deku,” Bakugo said.

“See? Bakugo is being a good friend,” Iida said.

“ _ How _ is fighting me being a good friend?” Midoriya asked.

“This is obviously a point of contention between you two, Bakugo is willing to help settle this in a definitive manner, that’s a good friend,” Iida said.

“ _ HA  _ yeah Deku, I’m such a thoughtful guy, fucking square up,” Bakugo said, but he was still lazing across the couch.

“How about leg wrestling?” Uraraka offered.

“No,” Iida said.

“Why not this time?” she huffed.

“Because if they’re on the floor rubbing their legs together then they’ve both lost,” Iida said.

That was when Kirishima and Tetsutetsu walked into the common room, both of them dragging their feet and weighed down by their backpacks. Clearly they had both barely survived homework.

“Hey guys! Who do you think would win in a fight? Midoriya or Bakugo?” Uraraka asked at them. They both stopped behind the couch and all four looked up at them.

“Midoriya,” Tetsutetsu said and Deku gave Kacchan a loud “ _ ha HA!” _

“Why?” Uraraka asked.

“Faster, not above breaking his hand to punch someone’s face,” Tetsutetsu explained.

“Bakugo,” Kirishima said and Kacchan snorted.

“Why?” Midoriya asked.

“‘Cuz he’s Bakugo,” Kirishima said and the explosive boy reached back to fist-bump Kirishima.

Uraraka considered this, and looked between the two standing behind her.

“Who do you think would win in a fight between the two of you?” she asked them. Both Kirishima and Tetsutetsu snorted.

“ _ Me,” _ they both said. They started a little and looked at each other incredulously.

“ _ You?”  _ they both asked. Both glared hard and faced each other.

“ _ Me,” _ they both said and grabbed each other by the shirt collars and lurched forward.

** _THUNK_ **

Kirishima and Tetsutetsu reeled from the brutal mutual headbutt. And they both fell backward and hit the ground, each out cold.

“See?” Iida said. “There’s a good friend.”


	2. Dick Talk

All Might had a nice little weekend tradition where he would spend the morning picking up litter. When he became a public figure it was sort of a nice way to prove that All Might cared about people breaking even the small laws, and it felt like his civic duty anyway. He kept it up when he officially retired because it was a way to keep being a good sumaritan while not giving his doctor an ulcer. 

Now that he had friends who were also co-workers Yagi found that his morning litter patrol had become a group activity. They would all take a walk along the perimeter of U.A.’s campus and down the road leading up to the front gates picking up trash as they went.

Today Hizashi, Nemuri, and Thirteen were joining him on his walk. Hizashi was, as usual, chatting up a storm.

“Fist Pump, Power Stance, Knight Popping Heroes, Spandex Cats -” Hizashi rattled off.

“I don’t  _ care _ what it would be called, I’m not joining a band with you,” Thirteen said as they stuffed a fast food wrapper into their garbage bag.

“Aw, c’mon we’d be a  _ Dream Team!  _ OH! That’s the name right there!” he shouted.

Yagi stood up, his arms full of soda cans and some take away boxes.

“There’s been an incident and I’d like to address it,” he said firmly. 

His friends looked at him, all of them looking deeply concerned.

“Oh, shit, what’s up big man?” Hizashi asked. Yagi sighed heavily and put some of the trash in his bag. He rested a hand on his hip and looked up at his friends.

“I saw Aizawa’s dick,” he said.

“What?” Thirteen asked.

“You saw his impaler?” Hizashi asked.

“His WMD?” Nemuri asked.

“His friendly weapon?” Hizashi asked.

“You saw Aizawa’s middle stump?” Thirteen asked.

“Well -” Yagi tried.

“You saw his PhD?” Hizashi interrupted

“Oh my god, how did  _ this _ happen?” Nemuri asked in delight.

“I was just going upstairs to the showers the RA rooms share and he’s coming out of the showers when I walk in and he didn’t have a towel or anything so I see, well, his hollow point,” Yagi explained.

“His hard drive,” Nemuri said and Yagi looks at her and coughs a little.

“Well his floppy disk is what I saw, yeah,” he said.

“Don’t leave us in suspense, what’s the assessment?” Hizashi asked and gave All Might double finger-guns.

“Yeah, I’d hear an evaluation,” Thirteen said.

“You know what?” Yagi said and looked up at the sky slightly wistfully. “It looked like a tall boy can of red bull hanging there.”

“No,” Nemuri gasped.

“It looked like a tube of tennis balls hanging there,” Yagi said “A four pack.”

“Shut  _ up, _ ” Nemuri said.

“It looked like a policeman’s flashlight hanging there,” Yagi said.

“Dang, good job Aizawa,” Thirteen said and Yagi looked to them.

“That’s what I thought, like good for him,” Yagi said.

“Oh man, good for you, Aizawa,” Hizashi said while nodding in vague disbelief.

“Right? Like I’m happy for him,” Yagi said.

“ _ Wait _ , hold on,” Nemuri said. “Sometimes if a dude is really tall his dick can look small even if it is actually really big.” Yagi blinked at her.

“Have you been reading my diary?” he asked.

“What I’m  _ saying _ is Aizawa is not a big guy, are you sure his dick wasn’t just accentuated by his tiny frame?” Nemuri asked.

“It looked like a one-liter thermos hanging there,” Yagi said and Nemuri gaped at him.

“ _ Fuck!”  _ Nemuri threw down her garbage bag and stormed away back up the street towards U.A. Yagi walked over and picked up her discarded bag and looked at his friends.

“Maybe there’s such a thing as too much dick talk,” he said.


End file.
